Things I Swore I’d NEVER Do

I have a tendency to think that I know everything about everything, I often think that I know the best way to handle a situation even though I may not have much experience in the area. Take Mothering as an example, I had the handling of every obstacle and hot button issue mapped out before my eggs were even released from the ovary.

 

As I gain more and more experience I often find myself remembering all the things I swore I would “never do, when I have kids”, and yet find myself doing some of these things on a regular basis. Sometimes I think about tasks that I thought would be easier and realize now that I make compromises just to get through them, these choices don’t fill me with pride. However there are many things that I used to think I couldn’t do or wouldn’t do them no matter what, and yet I have found that God has given me exactly what I need to do them and that’s a good thing, because I’m probably a better mother for them. Through trial and error I have also learned that many things are really not that big a deal and it’s ok to adjust my plan as I go, it’s always a good idea to be flexible when you are a Mom.

So in no particular order, here are some things that I currently do or have done as a mother, despite having claimed that I would “Never Do” them in my pre-children naivete.

1. Let the television babysit my children…now I turn on the DVD player in the van just to drive 3 blocks to school, anything to keep them quiet.

2. Feed my children food that comes in unnatural forms…now yogurt tubes, fruit-by-the-foot and cheese strings are regular lunch items.

3. Wear my hair in a ponytail for 67 consecutive weeks…now, I don’t even need an elastic to hold it anymore, it just grows that way.

4. Use dinnertime battles to educate my kids about starving children who would be happy to have the meatloaf they are refusing to eat…now it’s a standard lecture at our dining room table.

5. Look forward to time away from my kids…I love them more than anything, but some days a weekend away starts to look like heaven.

6. Ice skate, skateboard, swim in public, play soccer, practice tae kwon do, slip n’ slide, Chuck E Cheese…now I find myself participating in all of these activities with my children regularly, except Chuck E Cheese, I try to avoid that place like the plague!

7. Let my daughter play with objectifying or unrealistic toys like Barbie…now they are my absolute favourite toys, dolls and movies. My daughter is lucky if I let her play with MY Barbies.

8. Let my little girl leave the house without perfectly styled and orderly hair…now I find letting her sleep with braids makes for good get-up-and-go hair the next day…anything to make the mornings run smoother.

9. Be capable of cleaning up vomit, wiping snotty noses and picking lice out of hair…and yet I am now an expert in all these undesirable tasks.

10. Respond to questions with “Because I said so”…unfortunately sometimes I just don’t feel I need to give a better reason. After 24+ hours of labour this is a good enough reason to obey me.

11. Let my children watch Spongebob Squarepants…I am embarrassed to admit that I caved. No excuse, no honourable goal, I just can’t come up with a valid reason to prohibit it other than it’s just stupid.

12. Let my babies have soothers…when my son was born they gave him a soother, to my outrage, I quickly realized what a useful tool I had been given. It was a well-utilized device for both my children and not so hard to give up after all.

13. Go Camping, I have always had an intense dislike for the outdoors…now I pack my citronella candles, coffee maker and inflatable raised mattress and I am as game for nature loving as the next city girl.

14. Let my children eat froot loops, chocolate milk, pez candy, gummi worms, fruit roll ups, dunkaroos and cotton candy…because they never got these things when they were small, they have healthy appetites and more often than not make better choices, so I can give them these things once and a while as treat and they don’t get out of hand.

15. Have Children…yes, that’s what I said. I swore for years that I would never have children, people who knew me will remember my vehement argument against it…and yet now, there is not a day that goes by, no matter how difficult or stressful my job gets, that I regret my decision to have children. They are my life and bring me more joy than anything I could have planned or imagined!

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2 responses to this post.

  1. Ok, I’m not stalking you I swear. Your post are freakin funny.
    My favorite from this list, !1, #6, #22,#30 and most favorite #20.

    Keep enjoying those babies. =)

    Reply

    • Posted by lolasaldia on May 26, 2009 at 6:06 pm

      No problem, it’s nice to get feedback, my family and friends are probably sick of reading my stuff, it’s good to get someone else’s perspective!

      Reply

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